AUDIOVILE
By Mike Arnzen
Raw Dog Screaming Press

Michael Arnzen is a sick, twisted man. OK, that isn't true: Mike Arnzen is a hell of a nice guy and a proponent of higher education; this CD, AUDIOVILE, containing Arnzen's readings of some of his micro horror fiction, coupled with music he composed himself, is a sick, twisted piece of work--and I loved it!

I'm not a fan of short horror fiction: I don't read much of it and I rarely attempt to write it. When I do read it, I find that the shorter the work is, the better I appreciate it. There is a skill set required to write a piece of fiction that runs 1,000 words or less, yet manages to deliver a blow to the solar plexus. Arnzen, a multiple Stoker Award winner, has proven himself a master at this form with his collection, 100 Jolts: Shockingly Short Fiction.

Arnzen is an Associate Professor of English at Seton Hill University in Pittsburgh. Frankly, this worries me: how is he warping the minds of our best hopes for the future? Sure, he seems like an affable enough guy, but behind that manic drive and wide smile beats the heart of a killer; shave off the whiskers and you just might find another set of teeth poised to snap at your nose. I've seen the man read his work and he seems to enjoy acting out his bloody tales with just a little too much glee for my sense of security. Check out the photo of him inside this CD, shouting at the microphone, and you'll be better equipped to imagine the expressions he must make while assuming the identities of his various characters.

The author brings this same devil-does-care attitude to his readings on this CD, which is available from Raw Dog Screaming Press and includes 16 tracks of brain damaging terror. Stories like "Psycho Hunter," "Stabbing for Dummies," and "Six Short Films About Chauncy the Serial Killer" will have you alternately cackling and gasping. The brilliance of these tales--amplified by Anzen's pitch perfect delivery--is that within the space of a couple of minutes, each one sets a grin on your face, then slaps it off, then kicks you in the groin and leaves you gasping (but still laughing), "That isn't right! That's just plain WRONG!"

My favorite story/performance is "Domestic Fowl," in which Arnzen depicts a man who successfully transforms himself into a chicken (a hen, not a rooster) by plucking the hair from his body. Whenever Arnzen starts clucking, my wife and I start laughing. It's so absurd, and yet so well performed! I had actually read the short story only days before listening to the CD, and really appreciated the way Arnzen brought it to life.

Lest you think the CD contains only Arnzen's demented readings, let me assure you that the music he composed and performed for each piece expertly enhances the vocal work, subtly working its way under each layer of your skin, while never becoming obtrusive.

AUDIOVILE is a terrific piece of work which horror fans will listen to repeatedly; it's also a sneaky way to get people like me to enjoy short stories. At the strangest times, I inexplicably hear a beat throbbing in my brain, accompanied by Arnzen's voice:

"He's a MAD-man... in plaid FLAN-nel..."

You can order the CD from Raw Dog Screaming Press and listen to samples on MySpace; visit Arnzen--but keep your distance!--at Gorelets, where you can sign up for his award-winning newsletter of the same name.